this would always be my favorite archetype

The world calls them Byrons. They're dangerous, exciting yet darn right attractive. Some call them the Draco-type. I just call them love. Ever since I was a little girl, I didn't dream of a knight-in-shining-armor who whould whisk me off my feet and take me to the land of happily-ever-after; I dreamt of a Byron who would constantly entice me with his words and life, mystify and captivate me to the point of obsession - someone who would fall for me over and over again.

***

Characteristics of the Byronic Hero

The Byronic hero--so named because it evolved primarily due to Lord Byron’s writing in the nineteenth century—is, according to Peter Thorslev, one of the most prominent literary character types of the Romantic period:

Romantic heroes represent an important tradition in our literature . . . . In England we have a reinterpreted Paradise Lost, a number of Gothic novels and dramas . . . the heroic romances of the younger Scott, some of the poetry of Shelley, and the works of Byron. In all of these works the Byronic Hero is the one protagonist who in stature and in temperament best represents the [heroic] tradition in England. (Thorslev 189)

A Byronic hero exhibits several characteristic traits, and in many ways he can be considered a rebel. The Byronic hero does not possess "heroic virtue" in the usual sense; instead, he has many dark qualities. With regard to his intellectual capacity, self-respect, and hypersensitivity, the Byronic hero is "larger than life," and "with the loss of his titanic passions, his pride, and his certainty of self-identity, he loses also his status as [a traditional] hero" (Thorslev 187).

He is usually isolated from society as a wanderer or is in exile of some kind. It does not matter whether this social separation is imposed upon him by some external force or is self-imposed. Byron's Manfred, a character who wandered desolate mountaintops, was physically isolated from society, whereas Childe Harold chose to "exile" himself and wander throughout Europe. Although Harold remained physically present in society and among people, he was not by any means "social."

Often the Byronic hero is moody by nature or passionate about a particular issue. He also has emotional and intellectual capacities, which are superior to the average man. These heightened abilities force the Byronic hero to be arrogant, confident, abnormally sensitive, and extremely conscious of himself. Sometimes, this is to the point of nihilism resulting in his rebellion against life itself (Thorslev 197). In one form or another, he rejects the values and moral codes of society and because of this he is often unrepentant by society's standards. Often the Byronic hero is characterized by a guilty memory of some unnamed sexual crime. Due to these characteristics, the Byronic hero is often a figure of repulsion, as well as fascination.

- http://www.umd.umich.edu/casl/hum/eng/classes/434/charweb/CHARACTE.htm

The Byronic Hero is a creation of the narrative poetry of George Gordon, Lord Byron.  The hero of Byron's highly successful Childe Harold's Pilgrimage (a vaguely autobiographical work) exhibits many of the characteristics; other Byron works featuring the Byronic Hero include The Corsair and Manfred.   

The Byronic Hero

• is a rebel (against convention, society, etc.)



• has a distaste for society and social institutions



• is isolated from society (a wanderer, an exile)



• is not impressed by rank and privilege (though he may possess it)



• is larger-than-life in his ability--and his pride



• has a hidden curse or crime



• suffers from titanic passions 



• tends to be self-destructive

One of the key connections that may help you understand the Byronic Hero is that he is, in some ways, like the Romantic conception of Satan in Paradise Lost--the rebel who fights against a tyrannical establishment but is destroyed by his own overwhelming pride.  This figure is an unconventional hero--dangerous and destructive, but admirable because he is larger than life.

- http://spider.georgetowncollege.edu/english/allen/byron2.htm

***

Must I have a song for the Byron types, it would be Kelly Clarkson's Beautiful Disaster.

He drowns in his dreams
An exquisite extreme I know
He’s as dammned as he seems
And more heaven than a heart could hold
And if I try to save him
My whole world could cave in
It just ain’t right
It just ain’t right

Oh when I don’t know
I don’t know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
Such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster

His magical myth
As strong as with I believe
A tragedy with
More damage than a soul should see
And do I try to change him
So hard not to blame him
Hold on tight
Hold on tight

Oh cuz I don’t know
I don’t know what he’s after
But he’s so beautiful
Such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster

I'm longing for love and the logical
But he's only happy hysterical
I'm waiting for some kind of miracle
Waited so long
So long

He’s soft to the touch
But afraid at the end he breaks
He’s never enough
And still leaves more than I can take
Oh cuz I don’t know
I don’t know what he’s after
But he's so beautiful
Such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster

He’s beautiful
Such a beautiful disaster

reminiscing

Checked out my old entries.

Hmm. I was wrong about myself. I thought I dumbed myself down during "that time" but in fact, I was just more reflective about life and stuff.

Maybe what happened was a change of priorities.

Maybe we all go through that phase and mine just came too early.

Maybe I was having some sort of mid-life crisis. I hope not, though. Bec that would mean I only have another eighteen years to live.

in pursuit of happiness and other deep things

My friend and I were talking a few days ago and like all decent conversations we have, it led to the arduous and often painful quest for the modern myths, happiness and contentment.

"I think I keep on wanting the things that are not so desirable because it eliminates the possibility that things would work out and at least, from the start, I know it wouldn't work out..." she said something to that effect but I distinctly remember that she used the words "elminate" and "possibility".

That conversation wasn't the usual whining we had. I think that in some twisted way, there is some truth to what she said.

***

Happiness is a bitch, really. I'm standing up to what I said last time that I'm through wooing her, it, whatever. People say happiness is a decision and that you've got to anchor it to something stable. But could you really choose what makes you happy? Isn't happiness something that just happens?

Gelo always told me that you can't change what's happening around you but what you could change is your perspective of things, how you look at it and your attitude towrads it. The git says the most sensible things at times, see.

For a while I thought the same principle would apply to happiness - if things fuck up, just look at the brighter side of things, take control, smile and be happy. Then it's just tiring. I mean, you have to exert effort all the time. I never really thought happiness as something forced. It's supposed to be this ideal of ideals, something serendipitous, something that just happens.

Then it hit me. After eons of runnig after it, I decided it was something that I will just welcome into my life, something that will just happen and I will embrace the moment as much as I could, be completely aware of it and also of the fact that it's fleeting - but since I am aware of these truths, I will not be afraid of its moment of departure. There. Happiness settled. Let's fathom contentment now.

***

The same friend and I were defining contenment. And I said, "it's knowing that there's something better out there but you wouldn't give up what you have right now for that other better thing."

Well said.

However, another friend of mine told me that I shouldn't really settle for the next best thing because the best thing is out there, waiting for me - bec the "enemy" of the best thing isn't really the worst, it's the next best. I wanted to agree with her, but contentment, as far as my definition and history goes, it's not as easy as that.

Contentment is what I would like to be decided upon. Do I go for this or that? So it's all about decisions, which takes me back to the original conversation with this friend. She told me that either consciously or unconsciously, she's deciding and wanting things that she knows isn't really deserving bec she knows it would fuck up. And for years, I carried on with the same mentality - to want things that I know would blow up in one way or the other bec I still have that sense of control, that I still know how things would turn out bec I decided for things to be this way, that I didn't really want things, that I'm less likely to be hurt bec I simply know and have decided this for myself. So I think I get the drift of what my friend has been telling me.

I think, (and this is not necessarily a claim) that we're all somehow jaded so now we're scared or we hide behind the pretense of contentment in one way or the other. And this is not just about love. This is applicable to almost all things in life we are searching for - be it romance, an idea, a lost ideal, a higher Being, a story or even ourselves. I think we're somehow scared to want things bec we know how powerful we really are and when we finally get what we truly want, we're just don't know how to handle it and we're so, so scared that one day, it might leave us or it might not be what we imagined. We're unprepared or we see ourselves as undeserving of something that great, something that amazing, life-changing (or ending)

I blame the movies. After the happily ever after, the scene fades out and the credits roll. It does not tell us what happens after so in real life, if we do get our happily ever after, we wouldn't know what to do as well. We can't simply fade out. And I personally don't think it's a good idea to do a Kurt Cobain...

But deep, deep in my heart (or the pieces that are left) I still want my happily ever after bec when I die, I want to look back and say that it's been a good life (and that Hollywood producers should make a movie out of my life since it's so freakin' awesome) Something like that. I think I do know what I want. And maybe it's about time that I give it a chance and some recognition. It maybe a leap into darkness, that unaimed shot into nothingness but I think it's still worth a try.

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